My sweet baby boy,
My heart is so full of you right now. I really am just writing to you to tell you how much I already love you. To tell you how much you being in our family will be one of the best things in all of our lives. I was so ready for another baby so when I found out you were in me, I cried. Tears so full of joy I felt my heart could burst. Then when I found out this time it would be a little boy, yep I cried again. (mommy is a cry baby…just ask daddy) Again, tears of joy of course. I feel like I already know you so well. I feel like you were meant to be my son from the beginning of time. I feel like you already love me so much too. Well, more than feel. I know it.
Your sisters already love you so much too. They always ask when you are coming. They adore you already. They want to protect you already. They are so sure to be careful with you in my tummy. They will get stern with each other if the other is feeling my tummy too hard. They said you could sleep with them. They have saved a spot right between them in their bed for you. I had to tell them you will be too small for a while, but I would love to have you three be so close. I would be the happiest mom to go into your room and see your big sisters sleeping next to you. Protecting and loving you even while the three of you dream. Your sisters are quite beautiful and so I will need you to watch over them as well. You will be younger, but you will be their brother. Brother’s have certain responsibilities. You will need to care for them. You will need to respect them. You will need to be proud of them when they accomplish great things, and you will need to set them straight when they are not being their best selves.
Your oldest sister Sadie is the heart of this family. I don’t think I have ever known a sweeter child in my life. She is always concerned with others, especially you. Sadie is always worried that it’s too dark in there and you will be scared. She will always ask when I am eating if you like what I am eating or if it will make you sick. She is a worrier. She loves you. She will be there to give you a hug when you are hurt and she will tell you she loves you when you are sad. She is sensitive and she is caring. She will laugh with you when you need her too and she will defend you when others are mean to you.
“Sawyer you in there?” (Jess says that while looking in my belly button. She really thinks she can see you through there) Little Jess is the fun of our family. All the knocking on your home to see if you are in there…it’s her. Just get used to it buddy, she can’t wait for her little brother to get here. She will be your partner in crime. I can already see you two soaked in mud to your waist, laughing and being the best of buddies. She is feisty, I must warn you. She will probably make you cry a lot, but she would fight for you in a heartbeat. When your dad or I get after Sadie she yells at us to stop…even if we are disciplining Sadie for something she did to Jess. She loves you. She will not let a soul ever hurt you.
Your daddy….well, I don’t think he could be any more proud to be having a son. I think he has already planned fishing and camping trips and talks about how to “get the girls.” He does anything and everything to provide for us and I hope that we can raise you to be just like him. He will always be there to talk to you and he will alwyas be ready for a wrestling match. He is a pretty funny guy. He and Jess will make you laugh all day. I can’t wait to hear your laugh. To see your smile.
We would do anything for you already. I can’t wait for you to be here, but I need you to stay in there a little while longer. You will be here just in time for the holidays. I think it will be the best holidays our family has ever had. Be ready for lots of kisses, lots of cuddling and lots of pure unconditional love all around.
Be safe and keep growing. I will be writing more love notes to you, but for now…I have said all that is on my heart tonight. I love you son.
Love,
Your mommy who is so in love with you… who has tears streaming down her face at this very moment.
